Changes...They Are A Coming...

Reading my blogroll last night I stumbled upon a most awesome idea. What if you could 'make yourself' over? I mean, what if you CHOSE to spend time each week making yourself into the person that you really wanted to be - the person deep down that exists but hasn't come out in oh, I don't know, 10 maybe 15 years? Over at Who Moved My Groove Laura is doing this - she's got 2 years (or 580 days) to do just that and she's thought it out rather well. Laura is taking a list of 20 things and doing them before her 40th birthday - each week choosing three goals and measuring her progress towards them.

This got to me - more importantly it got me thinking. Wasn't that really what I was trying to do? I mean, choosing sobriety was a big first step towards making over myself. Unfortunately (or fortunately since early sobriety really is about ...keeping yourself sober...which IS the only thing you can think out) that's about as far as I've gotten towards remaking myself into someone that I want to be rather than someone who I just am.

So, while I laid in bed trying to ward off the slight sunburn I amassed as part of my first day of vacation, what would my list entail? What are the things that I want to change about myself or get additional insight into? I'm not sure that I can think of 20 but I did come up with a list of 10 that I can work on right now:

1. Find three people 'in real life' that I count as friends.
2. Take a trip with only my husband and myself - even if it's just a weekend.
3. Create and decorate my daughters nursery.
4. Work with a nutritionist to develop healthy eating habits and then DO IT.
5. Volunteer at the rehab center that finally helped me face my demons.
6. Help someone face their demons.
7. Work towards having my daughters a week on and a week off rather than Wednesday through Sunday.
8. Educate myself on current political/current events and be able to discuss.
9. Learn to knit more than just a scarf - a sweater perhaps.
10. Host two dinner parties for new friends.

These might not be the most 'important' or 'difficult' goals but for me some of them are frightening. I haven't had a real 'in life' friend in over 6 years. For a while I was just plain unloveable - now I am paralyzed when I meet someone face to face in a social setting - I don't know what to say. I haven't been asked to go and 'do something', to a party, to anything and I'm lonely. For a while after becoming sober I was just scared - everything seems to revolve around alcohol - at least when you think you are the only one who 'can't' drink and maybe that was a 'safe' way to be - but now, now I'm ready to move forward and let go of the past.

If this sounds good to you why don't you join Laura and I? Sure, it will be difficult, and sure, we might stumble along the way but it'll be fun and, even if only some of our goals are met then we've still met the goal - to change ourselves in a meaningful way. Plus, if you are in the Atlanta area maybe you can become my 'in real life' friend!

Hope to see YOU on our journey!
xoxo, sober mommy


Sober Mommy said...

I think it's time for you to come over and spend some time in my pool, with a tall glass of iced tea.

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