Really - I'm Humble. Aren't I?

Humility

I was stumped.

In fact, I had to look it up because honestly, I didn’t know what it meant.

Further, to clarify how jacked up my perception of reality was at this point: My first thought when I heard the word: Humble? Isn’t that something from that stupid Charlotte’s Web Book?? Why in the heck are we talking about humility? I want to claw out the eyes of everyone here – WHY IN THE HECK did my husband leave me here – UGHGHGHGHGH.

Definition via wikipedia (because EVERYTHING on wikipedia is accurate & correct):

Humility, or being humble, is the defining characteristic of an unpretentious and modest person, someone who does not think that he or she is better or more important than others.

Wasn’t part of being in recovery to tell the truth – all the time? Why are you stupid people telling me one thing and telling me another? WHY AM I HERE? (Repeat nonsense such as this in your head for a couple of weeks until you acknowledge that you are ARE there and that you have no choice than to STAY so why not shut up and listen – it’s just easier that way.)

Here is the reality of Humility: If you have to look up the definition of the word in the dictionary then there is a pretty good probability that you aren’t smarter than anyone.

As a wife and as a mother I will admit readily that I struggle with this every day.

Sometimes my husband drives.me.crazy and is passive aggressive to the point of making me want to rip my hair out.

Sometimes my employer just walks right over the line of insanity and I have to start to question my own.

But here’s the deal: I’m not perfect. I can’t claim to be and I never will be.

Maybe, just maybe, the sentence above is my start of my understanding of the definition of humble.

xoxo, sober mommy

3 comments:

Sober Mommy said...

that is so funny ... i always think of charlotte's web when i hear the word humble, too.

beautiful post =)

Sober Mommy said...

I'm no good at the whole humble thing either and I'm not even in recovery. I guess all we can do is our best and since that's better than everyone else's best, right on! Oh, wait...what?

Sober Mommy said...

Thank you for the truly beautiful read.

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