Doctor Visits From Hell

This week I went to the 'crazy' doctor You know the one - the shrink? I loathe going to doctor but I especially loathe going to that doctor. Why? Because every time I go it's another rehash of my life to date.

Let's see where shall I begin? Would you like to discuss the fact that all my siblings passed away thus making my mother some over blown version of a parent? The term helicopter parent was *invented* for her. She might have even been the original version. I can't be sure of it but I'm pretty sure if she wasn't the first she was definitely in the minority back then - you know, the 70's?

What? You weren't born yet? Well, take my word for it that it was a much different time evidenced by my favorite outfit of that time A criss-cross dress in a strawberry pattern that my mother made me. That dress, along with a pair of white go-go boots.

We lived in Florida at the time.
Those boots must have stunk to high heaven.

But I digress.

Should I start more recently? Perhaps my divorce and subsequent journey through hell. Yes, that's a great place to start. I mean, who WOULDN'T want to rehash the last 5 years of their life. I've certainly gotten the story down to the 'important' highlights.

No, I really do not want to go through any additional therapy.
What I do want are my meds - thankyouverymuch.

So, no, the shrink is not my favorite place to go.
I did enjoy meeting the woman though and I'm very happy she gave me my meds.
I feel better already.
xoxo, sober mommy

You're Fighting For What? Exactly???

Last weekend we had a lot of fighting going on.

We had fighting about laptops.
We had fighting about having to put away our clothes.
We had fighting about having the clean up our!own!room!.
We had fighting about having to eat a meal - what was in it? Prepared how?

But then at other times I look around and I realize that it's just too much and I get mad at myself. I get mad that I've let them get to the point where their point of reference of life is so completely out of touch with reality for some.

Do they realize that they are living a better life than a lot of children?
Do they realize how lucky they are that these are the things they have to 'fight' out?

Don't misunderstand, I AM glad that these are the things that my children have to worry and fight over. I AM happy that they don't have to fight about where their meal is going to come from next, where they are going to sleep, or when they are going to have clean clothes. And I do realize that all of this is age appropriate behavior.

But still.

These laptops their father gave them - those puppies are driving me crazy.
xoxo, sober mommy

Fighting For MY Preemie

On December 26, 2007 Tony and I became the proud parents of Anna Grace. I would love to say that the day I found out about my pregnancy I was thrilled.

That would not be the truth.

I already HAD children. In fact, I had two girls - both adopted at birth. I had never gone through the feelings of loss associated with not having a biological child. I was happy with the way that my family was created. I had, truthfully, moved on from the idea of babies and certainly of pregnancy.

Months went by.

Then in November of 2007 I went to the perinatologist and was told to go sit in the waiting room and have a seat, we are getting you a room.

I wasn't prepared. I was only 29 weeks and 5 days.
Having a NICU consult when you are that gestation isn't a fun experience. Talking about survival rates, hospitalization timelines, long term implications while sitting in the labor and delivery room. Not memories I cherish.

We were lucky.
Others are not.

When I was contacted by @MoDBev on twitter to help promote the Fight For Preemies event it was an easy sell. Tony & I are direct recipients of MoD services.

On November 17th there will be a Bloggers Unite Event to raise awareness. It's called Fight For Preemies. You can see too that there is also a *badge* that you can add to your blog. All YOU have to do is signup for the event, add the badge, and write your post on November 17th.

It's pretty easy actually.

What the March of Dimes does?
It's pretty hard.

Please take a moment to consider taking the pledge and dedicating your post that day towards preemie awareness. Please consider helping to raise knowledge of the event through adding the badge to your blog. Please take a moment to write a tweet or two (or fifty) to help others learn of the event.

The goal is 500 bloggers.
This should be a piece of cake.

You can find the pledge and badge at:

xoxo, sober mommy

Random Tuesday Thoughts


Seriously, this is the best thing EVER because folks, I got nothin'. Nothin' at all.
But, I do have some random crap floating around my brain - so I'm getting it out.

  • People who abuse the English language. You know? Like the language you SPEAK, here in AMERICA for pete's sake. You know what? When you are writing an email, or a letter, or A RESUME - USE SPELL CHECK. In fact, USE IT TWICE. I had several resumes that I reviewed this week that had misspelled words. Well, since they don't have time to use spell check - well, I don't have time to review their resume.
  • The word irregardless. It's not a word. It should not be used. Ever. Doubt me? Look it up.
  • Kid/Adults - e.g. those who Fail To Launch. You know - like the movie. If you are over the age of 25 you know what? You need a job and you need to find a way to live on your own - however you have to do it. I did it - you can too. (If you don't know what movie I'm talking about well then you've missed some prime Matthew McConaughey AND an opportunity to see the rear end of Terry Bradshaw but don't let that stop you.)
  • On a more serious note - the disease of preeclampsia has been on my mind this week. Over the past few weeks those of us who moderate the Preeclampsia Foundation's bulletin boards were reminded there ARE women who still pass away as a result of this disease. Unfortunately, even in a nation as developed as America preeclampsia remains one of the leading causes of maternal and fetal death. The only cure is delivery. Please, if you are unaware of the symptoms and signs - please, please go to the Preeclampsia Foundation and read up. The knowledge you gain might save yourself, a friend, or your child. Know the symptoms, trust yourself.
So was that random enough for you? We've got a lesson on my hatred of the word irregardless, my disdain for those who are over 25 and not employed or going to school, my fetish for using spell check and how if you don't I probably won't be hiring you and finally, a little lecture about preeclampsia.

Oh, and a run on sentence.

Cause I'm AWESOME like that.

Thanks to Lu at Jaded Perspectives for this little gem. If you haven't read Lu yet, click on the link - you'll be glad you did.
xoxo, sober mommy

Are you ready for some football???

One of the things I love the most in the world is college football. I love the time of year, the snap in the air (although admittedly the beginning of the football season here in the south is ANYTHING but allowing of a cool breeze) and roar of the crowd. It's one of my very very favorite things to do with my husband.

I love red and black.
I hate orange - and all teams that have orange anywhere in their colors.

I'm changing up my 'chi' this week. I am going to do something that I rarely, rarely do. I am going to talk about and think about the game prior to Saturday morning because let's face it - last week was not a stellar outing.

So, with that said.
Go Dawgs.
Make me proud.
xoxo, sober mommy

Square Peg - Round Hole

For anyone that has a child that doesn't fit the 'norm' this post is for you.

Yesterday I spent a hour of my life that I will never get back outlining my frustration at the school system. Specifically, I spent an hour trying to explain, sometimes loudly and sometimes through tears, my fear that my middle daughter would be left behind by the school system because she is a 'square peg trying to be forced into a round hole'. Let me emphatically say that I fully realize that being a teacher is a difficult job. I realize that there are criteria that has to be followed and that there are requirements made by the state.


Some children just don't fit.
Regardless of how you try and make them.

Is it too much to expect that school psychologists come prepared to discuss remedial options with actual, I don't know, SUGGESTIONS? Is it too much to expect that there be an actual plan that is written down, has obtainable goals, and has checkpoints that are more frequent than every two months? Does anyone else have a child who has problems getting thoughts from their head out and onto paper while following rules of grammar, spelling, and punctuation? What is the purpose of forcing a child who has reading/language problems into writing everything in cursive? Wouldn't it be better to, I don't know, get the grammar, spelling, and punctuation down before we want her to write in a format that, admit it now, adults rarely use outside of writing their signature? And math? Don't even get me started. Is it REALLY a requirement to force a child you know has to use fingers and toes to do multiplication tables to do these stupid 'timed' tests? Yes, I DO understand the goal - and it's spot on for most children - most children DO need to have multiplication tables at their fingertips by 4th grade. But that REALLY the focus here? Wouldn't it be a better use of time to give her either the entire sheet and more time OR a smaller number of problems?

My point is this.
Darling daughter has to pass the 4th grade.
No matter what.

Bueller? Bueller?
Anyone ever go through this before?
I'm open to suggestions and this admitted narcissist is listening - please help.
xoxo, sober mommy

Okay...So Today Really Was Hard

One of the things that I promised myself was that, when I started this effort was that I would commit to all my feelings, good or bad.

The good has been easy.
The hard, well, I'm struggling with it.

I struggled today. I felt bad, I was mad with my husband, I was mad at myself. I was just MAD. In retrospect it was pretty ridiculous - and pretty childish but still, at the time, I was annoyed with life. I felt like one of those kids that doesn't get their way and kicks and screams only I wasn't allowed to kick and scream but trust me when I say that I was kicking and screaming on the inside.

So I did what any good self indulgent 42 year old child would do.
I went and had my hair colored and cut.
With money that I *may* or *may not* have had.
So, the children won't have steak this weekend.

They'll live.
I however, have cut and colored hair.
And I am not mad anymore.

Hubby just came home bearing a frosty.
Ooh, a frosty.
Life is good again.
xoxo, sober mommy